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The Christmas season is in full swing. On what is surely the first “Mad Friday” of many this December, The Fraudsters were appearing in The Derby Suite at Manchester’s Midland Hotel for Pinsent Masons staff Xmas party. But first, we had an “unforeseen circumstance” to circumnavigate. The son of our guitarist Squire was admitted to hospital with suspected appendicitis. Eeek! We gave the lad as much time as we could, but with just two hours to showtime, we had to draft in Ozzy Osborne to take Squire’s place behind Dave. “Obi-Wan Nickobi” has played with us a few times before, and a quick recap of the setlist in the dressing room meant he was ready and able to do the gig at short notice – professionalism at its best, and the show must go on! (He still forgot the ending to “Dakota” however……)

STUART and LINDSAY are acquainted with our lead guitarist Emmettz, being almost as regular as he is in their local ale house in Timperley (They go in there every day….. He goes in twice a day…..) It therefore goes without saying or singing that, having played a showcase gig in the pub in question, we would end up playing their wedding. The Do was at Albert’s Shed in Manchester’s trendy Castlefield district, so we Fraudsters decided to get set up and soundchecked early then do what every other Manchester band has done over the years – have our photo taken in and around the railway arches and canals of Castlefield. Another “acquaintance” of Prof. Metz, a photographer known as Mike, would be snapping and photoshopping our ugly mugs (and our ugly Burkes, and ugly Squires, and ugly Emmetts and ugly Richies……)

BOWDON Cinnamon Rooms is a place we know so well. Everytime we play there it’s like stepping back in time, and it was no different on this November evening when we were booked to play Michelle’s 40th. Our venue was the upstairs room. Downstairs on the BIG stage there was a 16 piece Glenn Miller-style orchestra, and an audience with lots of life experience, celebrating VE-Day by doing the Quickstep with Nicholas Lyndhurst in “Goodnight Sweetheart”

THE EVER broadening adventures of The Fraudsters saw them head out on their furthest journey yet – some 186 miles to a location in the Northumberland countryside near the town of Rothbury, famous for being the location of Paul Gascoigne’s proposed chicken, beer & fishing tackle delivery service last summer. Our furthest ever previous trip was Red Dwarf Bay Anglesey, 102 miles. That day we had a van with a knackered DVD player, so Dave, designated driver for this one, was dispatched to Hippy John’s with strict instructions to make sure we get a DVD player that WORKS!

Dave’s gig Blog – Four Weddings and hopefully NO funerals – August 2011 After six weeks of holiday related non-activity, the two weekends at the end of August were busy ones for our Fraudsting heroes as they had two weddings each weekend (that’s four weddings in total, maths fans) The Hippy Van was duly booked for the entire stretch, and Squire volunteered to drive for the first weekend (as long as a bed was provided on the bus).

Saturday 25th June was a challenging day for The Fraudsters. Extreme gigging. TWO gigs in one day. Because Dave was responsible for this abherration, it was he who had to drive the van. It was gonna be a doubly tough day because all the band had been on humungous booze-ups the night before – either at The Tofu Fighters gig in Sale, or at The Posh FC End of Season Do.

BEING a thoroughly professional outfit, The Fraudsters’ preparation for this 40th birthday party encompassed a “research session” with the Birthday Boy himself at his house the week before the gig. After Bob had cooked some delicious burgers on his barbeque, we talked about the forthcoming party and how he wanted us to play it. It was Bob’s mate Gillo who later summed up the discussions by saying: “I tell you what, there’s nothing better than sitting in the sun, drinking beer, talking sh**e with a bunch of di**heads!”

DURING THE JOURNEY up the M61 to this latest nuptial gigscapade, THE FRAUDSTERS were watching the DVD of Fawlty Towers in the tourbus. The hotel we were playing at was very far from being like Fawlty Towers however – what a beautiful countryside setting in the rolling Lancashire moorlands. And what a posh place it was too. In fact, when we arrived we had some trouble being allowed in as we were wearing our roady-ing scruffs and they didn’t believe we had anything to do with the wedding. Eventually we convinced them we were the band, but they kept us at arms length by telling us: “The wedding breakfast has only just begun. Please stay in your van. We will come and get you. Do not come in here again!”