Busy, busy day

by Emmett Stapleton

Saturday 25th June was a challenging day for The Fraudsters. Extreme gigging. TWO gigs in one day. Because Dave was responsible for this abherration, it was he who had to drive the van.

It was gonna be a doubly tough day because all the band had been on humungous booze-ups the night before – either at The Tofu Fighters gig in Sale, or at The Posh FC End of Season Do.

The meet time was 12.30pm at Dave’s, just round the corner from where our first gig of the day was to be – The Urmston Fiesta, aka the Urmstonbury Festival, aka the Tulips from Urmsterdam Massive. Dave had already been for a recce mission earlier that morning and had discovered an artic lorry trailer stage and a sound engineer (so far so good) but no power and no drum kit. A phone call to Burkey got him down early with his magnificent Sonor kit, while a generator turned up about 12 noon but it was dodgy.

By the time the main Fraudsters party arrived the Festival was in full swing. Jim was with us today because Squire was absent on outlaw duty. We were due on at 2.10pm for half an hour, but things were running late so we did not hit the artic trailer until about 2.35 and the stage manager was cutting everyone short to try & catch up. We managed to play Brightside, She Bangs the Drums, Heart of Glass, Dancefloor, Cigs & Booze and Sex on Fire before MC Digital Rascal stepped in to hurry things along, i.e threw us off stage! Check out our Facebook page (and the Urmston Fiesta Facebook page too) for some half-decent videos of the last two songs of our set.

After that it was straight in the van and back to Dave’s where we chilled out for a bit. Burkey and Mr X got chips & curry from the Chippy down Dave’s road…... Then annoyed Dave by chucking the polystyrene cartons into his PAPER recycling bin! Forget musical differences, this was recycle differences.

Once the band fights were over we headed for The Legh Arms in Sale Moor for Dale’s 50th birthday party. When we got there the pub was already PACKED. The party basically took over the entire pub and we played in the large downstairs back room. Needless to say the whole pub clientele was up for it, singing along, dancing on the tables…. The food was wonderful (curry) and the host and his missus even gave us some till for liquid refreshment! WELL looked after cheers!
Dale himself was A BIG United fan and extremely popular, so much so that a couple of his mates did an acoustic interlude during our interval, singing a song that would also be belted out football-chant stylee throughout the night. Based on the Kinks song “(Thank You For The) Days” it went something like this:
“Thank you for the Dale / He comes from Sale
He likes his ale / Believe me 
Dale’s been a boozer all his life / Dale once headbutted his wife”

There were others too, e.g a version of caravan of Love:

“Every woman every male / Join the caravan of Dale / Pissed up pissed up pissed up”

And the classic “How much is that cider in the window / The one with the wine and the ale….”

As I said, we had people dancing on the tables and chucking beer around (which makes up for the lack of a Superbikes gig this summer) and three blokes dressed in all over body stockings (which also makes up for the Superbikes!)

Guest vocalist Pete Boyle took over for Mr Whiteside and Panic. We finished the gig with Resurrection which involved EVERYONE stood on chairs and tables singing not only the words, but all the guitar parts and bassline aswell. VERY popular (even though some bloke, on hearing the opening drum beat, started singing “Pretty Woman!”)

We left The Legh Arms with another great gig in our pockets, and some curries in our doggy bags. Thank you for The Dale……..

Davebass